How does happiness happen? I think this is a really important question to answer. From my experience, happiness is something most people are genuinely seeking. Many of us even measure our success based upon our ability to be happy.
However, according to a 2017 Harris Poll, only 33% of Americans say they are happy. To flip this statistic, two out of every three people you encounter on a daily basis would say that they are not happy.
This statistic doesn’t surprise me.
Life happens -- and there are many things (like sickness, relational chaos, failure, unmet goals, and unfulfilled expectations) that can really take the wind out of our sails and cause our spirits to sag.
The amazing thing I have noticed, however, is that some of the happiest people I know are the people who have been through the fire and yet remain deep-spirited and joyful. How is this possible? How does happiness happen for some people -- even when life circumstances so often work to hi-jack the happiness that we seek?
There are many answers to this question, but let me zero in on two of them for our purposes today:
First, happiness “happens” when we choose to see all of life, including every high and low, as an opportunity to grow in wisdom and grace. The deep satisfaction that we seek isn’t merely a by-product of having a never-ending series of positive experiences. It comes as we develop into a person of depth and substance. We find true fulfillment in becoming a person whose life can be a source of inspiration to others. Let’s face it -- the people who’ve been through the fire and come out on the other side better are the ones who inspire us most. I believe that nothing in this life happens by accident and that everything we experience is a gift and an opportunity to learn and grow into a person of refined character.
Second happiness “happens” when we make a conscious choice to get our focus off of ourselves and onto others. Happiness happens when we choose to live beyond ourselves in the service of others. It happens when we choose to be a giver of our time, resources, and love. It happens when we choose to be a giver of encouragement by speaking words that lift up and add value to others. It happens when we intentionally set aside time to think of specific ways to be a blessing to the people we are privileged to interact with on a daily basis. I believe this is why the wisest person who ever lived said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Why? Because as people we are wired to give and sacrifice our own desires for the needs of others. We are created to not merely look out for our own interests, but also the interests of others.
And guess what? When we start to make these two foundational shifts, something amazing happens. We experience real undeniable feelings of well being, of shalom, of...well...happiness! This happiness becomes deep rooted and abiding -- a happiness that transcends mere circumstances.
What about you?
Most of us are on a continuum of happiness in our lives. In seeking to understand where people are at on the happiness continuum, the Gallup organization posed a specific question in their Gallup World Poll (a set of nationally representative surveys undertaken in more than 160 countries in over 140 languages) which states:
“Please imagine a ladder, with steps numbered from 0 at the bottom to 10 at the top. The top of the ladder represents the best possible life for you and the bottom of the ladder represents the worst possible life for you. On which step of the ladder would you say you personally feel you stand at this time?”
Let me ask the same question to you today…
What rung of the ladder are you on? And in reflecting on these principles, what needs to change in your own life so that you are experiencing increasing levels of happiness?
